Over the years, whenever my wife and I want ice cream from McDonald’s, something will inevitably be wrong with the soft serve machine. Today, the 4th of July (a day when I really wanted ice cream) proved to be no exception:
McDonald’s #1
Me: (Walks up to Counter) Happy 4th of July!
McDonald’s Worker #1 – What?
Me: Happy 4th of July!
McDonald’s Worker #1 – Ok. Can I take your order?
Me: Yes, two ice cream cones please.
McDonald’s Worker #1 – The ice cream machine is being cleaned.
Me: Will it be a long time?
McDonald’s Worker #1 – Yes, a very long time.
McDonald’s #2
Me: (Pulls up to drive through speaker with hopeful wife)
McDonald’s Worker #2 (Over intercom) – Can I take your order?
Me: Yes, two ice cream cones please.
McDonald’s Worker #2 – “Our ice cream machine ain’t working right now.”
Wife: You’ve got to be kidding. Let’s just give up.
Me: Never. This is a mission.
McDonald’s #3
Me: (Pulls up to drive through speaker) How many is this?
Wife: Three.
McDonald’s Worker #3 (Over intercom) – Take your order?
Me: Yes, two ice cream cones please.
McDonald’s Worker #3 – “The soft serve machine is broken.”
Me: Really? This is the third McDonald’s we’ve been to in the last fifteen minutes. Are they all on schedule to be broken today on the 4th of July?
McDonald’s Worker #3 – I don’t know. That machine breaks down all the time.
McDonald’s #4
Me: (Pulls up to drive through speaker) How…
Wife: (Interrupts) Four.
McDonald’s Worker #4 – Can I take your order?
Me: Yes, two ice cream cones please.
(Extremely Long Pause)
McDonald’s Worker #4 – Is that all?
Me: Yes. (withheld jubilation)
McDonald’s Worker #4 – “$2.16. Pull around.”
Me: Success.
Wife: (Rolls her eyes)
(Hallelujah Chorus plays loudly in car)
